The Effectiveness Of Fear

In Quarantine: Lessons from my Father.

    It is the end of the 5th week of my self Isolation/ lock down, and one of the greatest blessings of this is the time I have been able to share with the people I love, my family. I moved away from home for University, and it has not been easy spending quite a lot of time with them either away or together because of different schedules and all other things. My dad is one of my favourite people to be with and lately I just sit close to him in his own office and watch him work, and some other times he shares a lot of his story with me, his regrets, his mistake and also his joys. 

One of the sources of my Identity is my father because I love to tell people how much of a daddy's girl I am and also how much I see myself in my father (yeah, most of my excessive behaviour is from him). So I decided to share a few of the things my father has taught me.

   On life. 

LIFE IS SHORT.  Yeah, this is one of the things my father says and also one of his guiding principle, we have a short of amount of time in everything we do, just a little time to spend with friends, little time to spend with family, little time at the job you love, and so on. The sooner you realise that you have such short amount of time it allows you appreciate the people you are spending it with, you become more aware and conscious of how you spend it, who you allow into your life and so on. 

TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED, SO DO IT RIGHT NOW.  You want to travel to see the world, do it right now, you want to take care of your family do it right now, you want to tell someone you love them, do it right now. Stop procrastinating or waiting for the right moment, the right moment might never come, the perfect opportunity is not promised and above all, you are not promised tomorrow, so why leave to tomorrow what you can do right now.

HELP THOSE YOU CAN.  My father says, always give a helping hand, assist people you can assist be it helping someone cross the road, or lift their load, give a helping hand. one act of kindness goes a long way, for you and for the person that you offered help to. The beautiful thing about helping others is that it does not have to cost you anything. If you can go the extra mile for the person then support the person by taking some steps with the person.

KNOW YOUR LIMIT. Be aware of all the things you can do and the things you can't do, don't make promises you can't keep, don't try things you are aware you shouldn't. know yourself, your strength your weakness, your excess and your flaws but above all, know your limit and it would save you from making many mistakes and keep you from having a lot of regret later in life.

EAT, DRINK AND ENJOY YOUR LABOUR

    On Relating with others.

MAKE FRIENDS WITH PEOPLE.  My father tells me to make friends with people where ever you go. Be a friendly face, because the world needs more of such people, and so also at the end of your own life you won't have to pay people to become your friends. You won't have to pay people to be around you when you need them or when you need help in return because, in reality, no man can be an island. you don't need to have a thousand friend at the end of the day, even if it is just three, make friends.

TAKE CARE OF YOUR FAMILY AND YOUR COMMUNITY.  All your life, you belong to a family or to a community and it is your responsibility to take care of them. Now don't get e wrong in this, it does not mean you have to do everything for them and always be at their beck and call but take care of them, a member of your family needs to travel and needs someone to take care of their pet, help them, volunteer in your community, give back to people however you can.

    On Money Issues.

INVEST, AND HAVE MULTIPLE SOURCES OF INCOME.  My dad is an accountant and one thing he talks about is investing. Put that extra income to good use, don't just keep your money in the back invest it somewhere be it Forex or bitcoin, anything that is legit. and if you are not sure about how to go about it ask someone who can help. Apart from investing, have multiple sources of income, do not rely on a day job always try to do something else, it can be a paying hobby or a side hustle just do it because you never know when the tides will turn.

THE BEST WAY TO SAVE MONEY IS TO SAVE PEOPLE.  As weird as this sound, my father says life is not about putting money in the bank or saving it up somewhere. your money is only as secure as the next person by your side. if things go south and all you have done is to have money while the next person can't afford enough, it would come back to haunt you. everything you hold dear to you can be gone in a blink of an eye, you can be robbed by that homeless man on your street, by the agberos waiting for them when the time is just right for them. so save as many people as you can and you how to have less things to spend your money on.

FOR LUXURY ITEMS, BUY ONE WHEN YOU CAN AFFORD TWO.  Before you get that iPhone or the latest Samsung, make sure you can afford two of it. for what would happen to your reputation if your iPhone pro max was stolen and you begin to use a Nokia torchlight phone. (you get the basic idea, don't you?)

    On other issues.

You should speak up against injustice because you are the affected party, the government officials seem untouchable so if you have a voice use it to speak for those that cannot.

Whatever you are doing is just building on a foundation that was built by someone else. Don't be proud, be thankful to those that came before you and give accolades to people whenever you can. Someone paved the way for you (for those who understand the reference).

Remember to stay home and stay safe.

XOXO,

The Estherian.