Moving On: Healing a Broken Heart

source: twitter

    Heartbreak is one of the worse things to experience as an individual, it ranges from losing a loved one or losing close friends, rejection, to leaving a situation that no longer favours you, a circumstance that causes more harm than good. According to research, rejection, emotional pain and physical pain are all processed in the same region of the brain, and that explains why a break up hurts like it is from the pit of hell. (Pardon my language)  

        "To begin healing a broken heart,

          acknowledge that the other person is not going to be,

          your healer, support or your shoulder to lean anymore."

I recently suffered a heartbreak, and it was just sad. I stopped eating, was always sad, became withdrawn, felt worthless and was wondering why not me. A very good friend of mine sent the above to me and she constantly pushed me to get better, to heal and yes, to move on. And I am going to share my two Kobo on moving on.

source: twitter

To begin to heal, you need to

Acknowledge

        You have to come to terms with what has gone wrong. You have to tell yourself and accept that things happen and there is absolutely nothing you can do to change it. Tell yourself it is over, accept the door has closed and you need move away. This is the only way you can begin to heal.

I know I found it hard to accept the reality of the situation and I constantly stayed behind alone in the relationship, the constant calls that he no longer answered, the tears I cried, I became pitiable and desperate. When I told myself that it was all over, I began to heal and move on. It can be extremely hard, but it needs to be done.

Dissociate

        

source: twitter

        You need to remove yourself from situations, memories and people that constantly break your resolve. it may be the small changes like deleting pictures, changing your phone number, or deleting their phone numbers, or big changes like changing your work schedule, going on a vacation, and so on. remember that you are doing it for your own good. 

I know that when I already tell myself that I was moving on, I fell into the trap of making plans that involved both of us and all that did to me was hurt. 

Take your time to grief

        The only remedy to heartbreak is time, and the only cure to a broken time is time. 

Express how you feel, go through all the emotions, the pain, the anger, go through everything. be careful not to set a time limit for yourself and do not soldier through it. Allow yourself to grief, it is important to do this because it allows you to learn and grow. 

Pray

       "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." Psalm 147:3 (NIV)

Talk to God, it helps. You can express yourself to God. You don't have to form the words especially if you can't but the relief you get from having a conversation is beautiful. And there is the strength to keep ongoing.

Self-care

        This includes and is not limited to exercise, volunteering ( it helps you to stay active), maintaining proper eating habits, get enough sleep, get support from friends and family. Take yourself out, if you feel like, and begin to live your life once again.

Eventually, you would find that you are healing and you can move on without the pain, without the guilt. I would not mention what would go wrong when one does not recover from a broken heart, and I can't stress the importance of moving on, but I believe that it is something that needs to be done. I wish you well as you find healing.

With love,

The Estherian.