Becoming Stronger

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Week four of Fun Month at Transformation Church topic for 7N7 was "I got stronger when I let go of ..." The communicators shared something that they had to let go of to become stronger and it inspired me to share what I had to let go of and also what I had to do to become stronger.

To be strong is to be capable of withstanding great physical force, to be determined and unyielding, to be bold and it is the ability to stand despite whatever challenges we go through or we face. The truth is this, we all have to become strong else we would be tossed around and fall into every temptation that appears and even more spiral into a state where we lose sense of who we are and feel inferior. So how did I become stronger? 

I became stronger when:

I let go of my Self-Image.

    For the longest time, I saw myself from a wrong perspective. I let culture and people determine how I saw myself. I internalize the comments people say about me and slowly saw myself through the view and lens of others. The fact that I had a distorted image of myself made me weak. So I began to doubt myself and my capabilities, I sold myself short in almost everything, I settled for less than I deserved because of the wrong image of myself. I thought I was unlovable, weird, undeserving of something good and lastly that I had bad Karma. I remember crying and asking God to help me love myself because it was extremely hard to do that. So to become stronger, I had to let go of how I saw myself and began to see myself the way Christ saw me, someone, that is loved and worth dying for. It allowed me to find myself.

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I let go of my fears and insecurities.

      The side effect of having a distorted self-image is insecurities and fears. I was afraid of quite a lot of things;  what people had to say, how bad it would turn out, how out of place I would be and the list goes on and on. My insecurities made me incapable of loving myself. I am skinny, my face is not smooth, my hair is not long and lush and I didn't think I am beautiful. I had to let go of all that to become stronger. I know that my fears don't define me and my insecurities are caused by the loud noise of the culture around me, so I turned that off and began to appreciate the little things about myself and from there, it became easier to love myself.

I let go of my plans. 

    I love to plan my each and every day to the last step and this in itself is not bad. I had plans for my life, I had a deadline set for myself and I thought it made me in control and strong but I was not. Last year, I failed a paper and I had to rewrite it in three months and that showed me the folly of all my plans and how truly helpless I am. I had to let go of my plans and surrender the control of my life to God to get stronger. I don't mean I don't have goals, dreams and schedules but now I realise that my plans are useless if they are not God's plan and that is a source of strength for me.

I let go of my (unspoken) expectation.

    I expect a lot of things from people, from situations and from myself, and this sets me up for disappointment almost every time especially when they are unspoken. Gradually, I lost faith in people and refused to try out new things because I am like it would not deliver what I want it to deliver. To be stronger, I had to let go of all my expectations and listen, see, feel and embrace every new experience, what they had to offer not what I want to get out of it. 

I let go of resentment. 

    This is the last thing I had to let go off. It was not the easiest I can tell you. I carried around my resentment towards people and it was heavy, it pulled me down and made me weak. I could not appreciate the efforts of the important people in my life because I was angry, sad and broken. I remember Jesus saying to come to him, all those that were heavy burdened and he promised rest. I grew stronger when I let go of all that resentment.  

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I began to forgive.

    Letting go was just the first step, I had to learn how to forgive. Forgiving others has this thing it does to you. It sets you free and gives you peace. It was not the easiest thing and it took time. There was a lot of crying and praying and asking for help. There was a lot of talk and encouragement and finally, there was healing. I am stronger today because I learnt to forgive myself and others and I made a decision to always forgive no matter what.

I belonged to a community.

    Man was not made to go through life alone. You would need friends, family and every support you can get to live your best life. Belonging to a community makes you feel loved, involved and allows you to grow as you help others to grow. So if you want to become stronger, you have to belong to a community.

The Message

I found my Faith.

    I grew stronger when I found my Faith and this is the most important step for me. I remember when I was in Secondary School, I was a Christian because my parents were and going to church was the thing to do but I didn't believe in all that. I struggled with unbelief despite being around church all my life and I thought that was not the life for me, Jesus was for those people, not me. 

It took; God's grace, the slow journey of looking for God, learning what Christianity truly is (not what religious people interpret it has), the Holy Spirit reminding me and all the time Matthew 11:28 played in my mind till I finally found my faith. My faith provided me an identity and revealed a friend, Jesus Christ, that is willing to take every step with me and teach me how to live my best life. By best life, I mean a God-centred Life through faith. 

I have come to the end of my list. What about you? 

What do you have to let go to become stronger? Take your time to pray about it, ask the Lord to help you. I pray you would overcome all these obstacles and become stronger than you used to be. You can reach me on theestherian@gmail.com, I would love to hear from you. 

Have a blessed week.

The Estherian