THE ESTHERIAN BLOG

It is not every day you get the satisfaction of completing a task you set out to complete. And sometimes, you find yourself having to let go of a task with the hope you come back to it. So, I am celebrating my second year as a blogger and writer on this blog. And it is something. The initial plan was to do a follow-up on one of the earliest posts on the blog, in search of identity, and as I said earlier, you don't always get the satisfaction of completing tasks you set out to do. Source: Pinterest I read a post last Friday on medium as I was on my way to the hospital, and the writer stated that in our little ways, we are all saving lives. I know I am a medical student and the medical profession is all about saving human lives, even if I am more aware of the lives that we lost despite doing all we can. I started my posting in the accident and emergency unit last week, and death has become a lot more real in the past few days. The writer showed that saving lives most times aren't...

Photo Credit: Fauxels Source: pexels.com Loving you was such a beautiful thing. You are my best mistake to date, but with mistakes, you learn to live with them because there is no way you can take them back. And there are days I wish I could take it back. I wish I could say I can't remember the last time we talked to each other, but I can. I remember the conversation that ended everything between us. I remember being empty after and finally accepting that this is the last road in loving you. Sometimes my mind wanders to the times we spent together and to other conversations we had. My mind lingers around the laughter and smiles we shared. Slowly, I am letting myself forget all the bad times we had, letting go of the hurt and pain and allowing myself to be. I am ashamed to say that I bask in the remembrance of the good days and the good time we had, and I always whisper a thank you for the happiest year of my life. Loving you was good to me.  It helped me become a child again. It en...

Source: Pinterest Hello, I saw you from across the room and I know we made eye contact, one too many if I can say that. The truth is this, you reminded me of someone I used to know when life was still a bed of roses. Although now, I would say roses are overrated. I don't know if you noticed, but I like to believe I am funny, so you can be assured that I will try to make you laugh. I am on the path to becoming the funniest person in the family, trying my hardest to replace the current one, that's my father. Oh, I am sorry, I haven't introduced myself. I am Oluwaseyi Esther Adelaja, and I am aware of how uncommon that name is around here, and no, I cannot speak Igbo nor am I ashamed of that. I know enough to get by in conversations, and I am tired of being polite in conversations about marrying an Igbo Man. If we consider my track record and the current path I am on, it becomes clear that marriage is one of those things that would elude me for a long time. Oh, sorry, was that...

The thing about taking a break is this, you dread returning to the way things used to be and in my case, there is the fear of not being able to do half of what I used to be able to do. For example, everything I tried writing last month is incomplete, and I don’t know how to complete it.  In other news, I am back from my break.  Source: Pinterest So, what can you say about the first quarter of the year?  For me, the first quarter of the year has been unexpected, and I don’t mean in the pleasant surprise kind of way. At this point, everything seems neutral, and I have to be intentional about focusing on the good of every day as against the way I feel. Before the break, I was scared that if I kept trying to put something out every week, it would have this negative energy around it, and maybe it would be too much for my readers to relate to. I don’t know if my writing still has a sad undertone to it, but I rather just try to put myself back out, and it will come back to me. H...